The Contious Battle

I have never had something test my faith so severely as this trial. Instead of running to God I run away. I'm listening to music that is alluding to sinful things instead of pure eternal things. I don't want to wear clothes that make me look like a child of God, but instead ones that make me look like the rest of this world. Do you know what I feel? I feel dark, but I want to be light. I feel cold. I cannot hear God. I feel void. I am swimming in darkness by my own choice.

This shatters God heart. I have literally pushed him away and told him I don't care about all the things he has done for me, I am my own. I don't need him. Wrong.

Tests are suppose to be times we grow closer to God, but instead we tend to run away. When the fire gets hot and we decide that we are sufficient, we stop listening to Him therefore we get burned, we fall to our knees, and throw a tantrum like a toddler. We say to ourselves, “If God loves me why would He do this to me?” Because of our circumstances we take our eyes off eternity. We lose sight of what really matters. God never once said that the road we travel would be easy in fact He said the opposite.

“You will be hated by everyone because of My name. But the one who endures to the end will be delivered.”Matthew 10:22 HCSB

Jesus is completely honest up front. He tells us, “Hey, are sure you wanna follow Me because I hate to tell you this but the road I walk is not straight. It twist and turns, it goes up and down, and sometimes it disappears and you just have to jump.” Not exactly a turn on am I right?

The good thing is He doesn't stop there.

“For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:30 HCSB

Jesus goes on to say, “I know it will be hard but hey, run to Me! I will take your burden! I am strong. I can take care of you! Do you see these arms that were stretched out on the cross for you?  They can also hold you. So come to me.” We have to run to Jesus but we can't expect Him to take all our problems away in an instant. It takes time, and we have to surrender. We have to be willing to accept everything he says and we don't just do it once. Surrendering is not something you can just check off to say you've done it. No, we have to do it daily. It is a continuous battle, but one that is well worth the effort.